Right Relationships

Relationship

Quality relationships are both very precious and very sensitive. Right relationships are devoid of the personality’s ego or sense of I-ness, selfishness or self-centeredness, or at least, there is a conscious effort to be universal and inclusive. The ground of the relationship flows out of the nature of life itself and the purpose is to put others in the spotlight, not the personal self.

            Living in a community of elders has many rewards like moments when people are willing to share themselves and what is going on in their lives; likewise, there is the fear to share much about themselves.  There are moments when another’s love and respect shines in their eyes and through their proffered hand.  As you’d expect there are also countless stories of earlier days. All these life expressions are grist for building and even accepting and being responsible for a meaningful relationship. William Butler Yates said it well, “To share profound thought and then to touch is the supreme experience of life”.

 Invariably all relations with other people have boundaries, here or there.  With some you dare not be open about religion or politics. Others are very open to chatting about one subject or another. But no matter what, openness can be a magic key that is a foundation for trust and free expression.

When my Tibetan daughter arrived to study in America, she told me that in the Tibetan culture, the entire community supports the bonding of a newborn child and her or his mother. Women in the community share food, give child care and nurturing to the child and family. The men help in the fields or with the animals.  This can go on for months until the child’s parents and the neighboring community can tell that the mother is strong enough to care for the family and household and go about the chores that life itself has entrusted to her. The people in the community know because they have given themselves from the heart, sacrificed their time, energy, food and other things that might help a family’s survival.  They live for and because of each other.

 Building good relationships is the essence of good business, politics that can really matter in many lives, and a sound basis for friendship and self-growth. To touch another’s heart creates an almost indestructible memory that can be food for the soul for a lifetime.  

*     *     *

The quote from Yates is on a page entitled “Relationships” in a book entitled Life Meditations by Edward J. Lavin, S.J. Published by Wings Books, New York, 1993. No page number is given.

All rights reserved. 2019 Rebecca Field